Move Making

And just like that I can breathe again. Funny how getting rid of things you don’t use or have forgotten about, makes such a significant difference in our mental wellbeing. Selling my grape gravel bike was definitely a kick in the teeth, but it’s a move/sale that had to be done for the sake of my long term goals. I simply need the money. Ideally, I’d be spending about a year on the road and in the camper. During this time, I would be learning about each community, city or town. Hoping for smaller crowds, small town vibes and beautiful surrounding landscapes and scenary. Then I would settle. Park the camper and stay a while. If an amazing opportunity came my way, I’d be open and willing to see how it would fit. Hopefully staying healthy, growing consistently and learning new lessons on a daily basis. Ultimately, I would end up somewhere in the PNW and start building long distance ride routes in and around my new found home. Goals and dreams initially have a shine and glistening to them, but in reality they’re dirty, rough and sometimes sketchy. Keep in mind, it’s a part of the process. Put yourself out there. Never give up. Stay focused and stay hungry.

Bye Bye Bunkhouse

Thursday was one of the most productive days in quite a long time. Started with a bike ride for errands, then picking up a bike box and walking it back (to ship my gravel bike) and packing material at two different bike shop locations. Then proceded to get caught up with life insurance tasks, to get prepared for September. I spoke with attorney’s about the roundup litigation and finally a shower. Right around 3pm, it hit me. It was the perfect time to jump on a project, that I was planning on for years. Time to remove the bunkhouse and turn it into a gear/storage room.

I was ready to go.  As soon as I got the thought in my head, I literally jumped out of my chair and went directly to it. It felt like I was pulled and pushed into the direction I needed to go next. I started pulling a bunch of shit out of the storage under my bedroom. Took the blower to it. I’ll probably end up reorganizing it again. I literally have to climb inside.

Next morning up at 8am. Couldn’t fall asleep due to the excitement I had for getting this bunkhouse reno done and behind me. Took Linky via his favorite walk and had a bowl of granola, with a shot of espresso. Rest of photos en route.

Don’t Stop

I have good news and good news.

The good news is I am nine days out since having the skin cancer removed from my cheek, and the incision site being covered by a skin graft from under and behind my ear lobe. My healing powers are still in tact. My pride and mindset forged with a new mindset:

Don’t stop for nothing (spellcheck wants me to use “anything”, but this is me). What does this mean? Well, instead of letting the known fact of my anti-rejection medication being a catalyst to additional skin cancer scares, and potential different cancer/organ issues, paralyze me and create depressive and negative thoughts/outlooks. I am not going to stop living. The only time I will show up for a medical/doctor’s appointment, is for my annual heart transplant checkups and if an injury/condition is unbearable. If I am unable to walk, to ride, to speak, to be independent, then I will go to Urgent Care, ER etc. Why?

Well, this came from how my skin cancer was found. I had my annual dermatologist appointment, which is a part of my annual heart transplant checkup. They found two spots that they wanted to biopsy. One which was a bit painful for a while, on the top part of my left ear lobe. The other was a painless, dried spot which I barely noticed. Turned out the painful spot was nothing and the painless spot was malignant. This experience blew my mind and really wrecked me the past few weeks. Had many nights crying myself to sleep, wondering if moving into the camper was a good decision being newly diagnosed with this skin cancer, wondering/worrying if I’m going to die from something that doesn’t hurt but somehow appeared on/in my body. Truth is, that is not how I want to live. That is not “living the best life I can”. It’s living my life scared, holding me back is not healthy for this heart.

The other good news is finally feeling adapted to living in the camper. Finally living some level of organized. A “rhythm” of some sort. Not riding a bunch, mainly the e-bike for groceries and errands. A lot of walking (thanks Linky). Much less time on the phone, social media. More time reading, breathing and living with less angst and anxiety. Being among the trees, the Topo Topo mountains and incredible friends, really is good for the heart and soul. I suggest you find yours. Life is too short to not.